I'm feeling frustration tonight. I expressed displeasure over something to a new friend, of course not thinking about the fact that said new friend isn't like my old friends. New Friend is a wonderful person. I enjoy her company, I like being around her. But I just felt dismissed when I expressed my displeasure over a certain topic. It wasn't that she wasn't listening. It wasn't that she was trying to be mean or hurtful. But so have someone tell me that I have no reason to be displeased over something when I am feels really crappy, especially now that I know I have a choice in making up my own mind. My old friends probably would have reached the same conclusion as new friend, but I would have felt heard. That they understood that while they disagreed with my thoughts, that they are still my thoughts and feelings and that I have the right to feel them.
It's left me feeling crappy and sad and missing my old friends. I should call some of them tomorrow.
11.10.2008
11.05.2008
How important is it?
Two posts in one day!
I love taking showers. Besides that whole hygiene thing, it's a great time for me to think with little distraction.
I've been obsessing over something thats been annoying me now for at least a week, probably more. Tonight in the shower the thought came to me: How important is it? Really, it isn't. The end result in either direction probably won't matter very much. I might get ridiculed a tad bit, but I'll know that it isn't actually my fault (this is that part that I've been obsessing over). Thank you Al-Anon for giving me back shreds of my sanity and serenity.
I love taking showers. Besides that whole hygiene thing, it's a great time for me to think with little distraction.
I've been obsessing over something thats been annoying me now for at least a week, probably more. Tonight in the shower the thought came to me: How important is it? Really, it isn't. The end result in either direction probably won't matter very much. I might get ridiculed a tad bit, but I'll know that it isn't actually my fault (this is that part that I've been obsessing over). Thank you Al-Anon for giving me back shreds of my sanity and serenity.
thoughts on voting
Well, you can see how well NaBloWriMo ended for me. Much like many of my other wonderful ideas.
Breaking my anonymity just a little: I am an American citizen. I got to vote yesterday and was quite excited to watch election coverage all evening. But this also leaves me a bit sad, but probably not in the way many of you might expect (I'm not even sure I have readers to be honest!). Al-Anon has taught me to look at other people in a different way than I used to. While I still have problems in groups making decisions based on substantial unanimity, I know it's the right thing to do. I realize that it will be a rare moment that everyone in a large group can be pleased with a decision, but to have everyone in a group know that they have been heard and that others have thought over the position of the opposition has become more and more important to me. I love in area meetings when things get mulled over and nothing is rushed into (Rarely is anything urgent important, and rarely is anything important urgent comes to mind). I love that I can speak up at area meetings and have people respect that I might have a different opinion than them. I also like that we try to reach decisions based on what is best for the group, not the individual.
And that is why I think I have such a hard time with national politics. I tend to cast my vote based on what I think is best for the country. Thankfully it's usually what I hope will be best for me, but national politics isn't about me, it's about the entire country. So it really pains me to see so many people think only about themselves when they enter the voting booth. It also pains me to see people not be respectful of others and their choices. I respect that people have the right in this country to vote differently than I do, and I encourage it in the respect that if everyone thought like me we'd be screwed.
While I am mostly happy with many of the results from yesterday (and I'm not going to be more specific than that, because my politics don't matter in Al-Anon), I'm left disappointed that there are still large numbers of people in this country that don't respect that others want to live their lives in their own way. In Al-Anon, it would be like telling everyone they had to do the steps the same way and that they had to interpret the traditions and concepts the same way. It would be all meetings having the exact same format. What works for some individuals and groups doesn't work for others, and I wish more Americans would learn that their beliefs aren't necessarily what is best for others.
Breaking my anonymity just a little: I am an American citizen. I got to vote yesterday and was quite excited to watch election coverage all evening. But this also leaves me a bit sad, but probably not in the way many of you might expect (I'm not even sure I have readers to be honest!). Al-Anon has taught me to look at other people in a different way than I used to. While I still have problems in groups making decisions based on substantial unanimity, I know it's the right thing to do. I realize that it will be a rare moment that everyone in a large group can be pleased with a decision, but to have everyone in a group know that they have been heard and that others have thought over the position of the opposition has become more and more important to me. I love in area meetings when things get mulled over and nothing is rushed into (Rarely is anything urgent important, and rarely is anything important urgent comes to mind). I love that I can speak up at area meetings and have people respect that I might have a different opinion than them. I also like that we try to reach decisions based on what is best for the group, not the individual.
And that is why I think I have such a hard time with national politics. I tend to cast my vote based on what I think is best for the country. Thankfully it's usually what I hope will be best for me, but national politics isn't about me, it's about the entire country. So it really pains me to see so many people think only about themselves when they enter the voting booth. It also pains me to see people not be respectful of others and their choices. I respect that people have the right in this country to vote differently than I do, and I encourage it in the respect that if everyone thought like me we'd be screwed.
While I am mostly happy with many of the results from yesterday (and I'm not going to be more specific than that, because my politics don't matter in Al-Anon), I'm left disappointed that there are still large numbers of people in this country that don't respect that others want to live their lives in their own way. In Al-Anon, it would be like telling everyone they had to do the steps the same way and that they had to interpret the traditions and concepts the same way. It would be all meetings having the exact same format. What works for some individuals and groups doesn't work for others, and I wish more Americans would learn that their beliefs aren't necessarily what is best for others.
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