I’ve always been of the mindset that meeting makers make it. I’m pretty sure I picked this up from going to AA meetings, as I’m sure I’ve never heard it in Al-anon meetings. And its something that I’ve agreed with and understood the concept behind. Needless to say, I haven’t been making it to meetings lately (I think I'm hitting a week and a half right now). I realized on the way home the other day that by stressing to get my work done at work, get home, get dinner cooked, get fed, and out to a meeting, I was loosing a lot of serenity. So it made sense to me to lower my priority of going to meetings. But I felt guilty about it. Until this weekend. I had my second fifth step meeting with my sponsor, and towards the end she made the comment that I was working a good program. I had the reaction of “Even if I’m not really going to meetings right now?” And the answer was yes. I’m not going to meetings not because I’m avoiding someone, isolating, or just sitting at home on my ass. I’m actually taking better care of myself by not going to meetings. I still do other things. I write about it. I (occasionally) pick up literature. I call people and talk to them. I haven’t had much particular to talk about lately, but I’m still talking to program friends regularly. I’ve also been dealing with my fifth (and I guess sixth) step(s). My brain most certainly has not stopped thinking about program things. If anything, I think about them in a more conscious manner.
And now? I no longer feel guilty about my lack of meeting attendance lately.
