My goal is to start posting weekly here. We'll see how that goes.
I wrote this in meeting a few weeks ago. I thought this would be a good start for my weekly posting.
Step 7 states "Humbly asked him to remove our shortcomings." This step assumes a few things. It assumes that I have given over my will and my life in step 3. It assumes that I trust that I have a loving and caring Higher Power and that I trust that that HP cares about and for me. It supports me with my best interest at heart. But what if I don't have HP like that? What does that look like? It means that I am hesitant to entrust my will and my life to that HP. It means I see little use in prayer, because why would I pray to something that I don't really think will help me? It means that I don't have faith that I will be taken care of. How can I overcome this? I'm not entirely sure, but I have a few ideas, many of them based on the idea "Fake it til you make it." I can pretend I have a loving HP and I can pray to that HP. I can pray to be shown that that HP does care for me and have my best interests at heart. I can use my God can and physically turn over my concerns and worries. I can pretend that life will be ok and that I will be taken care of, letting go of my fear of the future. I can keep going to meetings and listen to how other people came to trust their HP. I can seek spiritual answers that come from outside of me. But perhaps most important, I can be willing and open to the ideas that come to me and be willing to try them.
